The year seems to be flying by
And already we are back exhibiting at the Yoga Show in London
We’ve been doing this since 2012 and the journey has been an interesting one!
Let me take you back to that very first show when I was just 10 days sober….
I’d written my first book the year before when I was sober, but in the interim of writing and publishing had started drinking again. Drinking even more excessively than before too. For us to exhibit at a show like this literally costs thousands of £££ and is a big deal, and I knew that I couldn’t stand there giving out leaflets about a book in which I talk about taking my last drink, if I was still drinking; wasn’t going to happen!
But
In the weeks leading up to the show I was getting more and more stressed
Leading to heavier and heavier drinking
Which in turn created even more pressure
I couldn’t not go
That wasn’t an option
I wanted to get my book out, and the six months sobriety the previous year had been so easy
So WHY WHY WHY was it so difficult now?
I’ve used two words two paragraphs above:
Stressed and pressure
Add to these main ingredients, lack of support, and you have the perfect mix for disaster. Nothing tasty or exciting is ever going to be baked from that recipe, which is why we need to surround ourselves with those that understand us, support us and lift us. Luckily for me I had a reason with a deadline which shoved me over the finish line of this monumental ask; leaving it until the last minute, I mean only 10 days sober (I remember thinking it HAD to be over a week!). I drank myself stupid that last weekend, and then on the Monday morning, which was the 14th October I had my first sober day.
I have documented all of this before in my blog
This is part of what I wrote last year:
“Only 10 days sober and still suffering from the fatigue of the first few months of sobriety.
I’d packed my uppers and downers: 10g of valium for each nighttime and copious amounts of guarana (natural pure caffeine) for each morning; my staple fix any time I needed to concentrate.
I had so much to prove
Felt like the new kid on the block, even though I’d already been teaching yoga for nearly 12 years back then
I still didn’t really KNOW who I was
Was still living through my eyes, rather than from my heart
I was fixated on what I looked like and how I dressed
Felt the obligation to ‘fit in’, ‘look like everyone else’, and ‘act like a yogi’
This is the wonderful thing about when you do something repetitively (like exhibiting at the Yoga Show for example); you have a reference; you remember what you felt, said, and did the last time and the time before.”
Read the whole of last years blog here
This year there is even more shifts
I have noticed that I am even less bothered by what others think
Knowing that I am in total alignment with my heart and truth is all I need these days
NObody else has the ability to push me off this balance
The reference for this is getting ready / packing for the Yoga Show.
In the past I would have a hairdryer, hair straighteners, hair curlers, loads of make-up, different outfits, and I would obsess about what I looked like. This year it’s simple; wear what I feel comfortable in, and effortlessly be myself. No need to over-complicate things or pretend to be something/one that I’m not.
It’s a bit like when you upgrade your eating habits and realise that the only aisle you need now in the supermarket is the fresh produce. Shopping is so much simpler and quicker, and this example is a metaphor for my life now;
Uncomplicated
Sincere
Compassionate
Flowing
Undemanding
When you get through the layer of external neediness
And reach the acceptance within
Everything gets easier
And life becomes a smooth and enjoyable ride
This years show for us has this energy as a foundation
It’s been fun, entertaining, and most importantly RELAXED
And because of all of this it’s been
S U C C E S S F U L
It has to be
Because of the space that we are in…
If you’re in London today, come along to Stand E10 and say hi, and even catch a free Quantum Jumping Yoga class with me!
Member Quote Of The Day.
Read here something that has been said by one of the Quantum Sobriety Online Programme members over in our lively private forum: