My greatest fear
Never materialised

So actually I spent so much wasted time worrying about absolutely nothing
What a lesson
And this was on day ONE of the puppy coming to live with us

I worried that he would have separation anxiety from his mum/siblings
I worried that he would not like us
I worried that he would ruin stuff
I worried that he would hurt himself
I worried that, and this is the biggie, the cats would hate him and us forever
I also worried that they would attack him, scratch him, maul him

But that is not how day one played out at all
The cats were interested in him but found him NO threat
Unlike in the previous few months with all the stray cats that have materialised up here on the farm and who have been letting themselves in through our cat flap to eat the girls’ food. As a hunter dog I worried that he would have the instinct of them as prey, but no he was not in the slightest bit interested in anything/one other than his new daddy, whose lap he curled up into when on the other side of the baby gate to the cats.

We called him Cacao Quantum De Rosa
He is chocolate brown with his mum being Weinerama (grey) and dad a Vizsla (red). The middle name Quantum was because I knew he was going to be our teacher; that magic was going to happen, and even on day one it did. In fact it began on the day we met Cacao; we arrived at the breeders house (we’ve both always had rescue cats, but felt we needed to be careful with a puppy and the hotel business we are in, which is why we chose the breeder well, and didn’t get a rescue dog) and met the litter, mum, and dad. Dom then stepped into the gated off area and picked up the dog that he felt connected to and at the same time that cacao nuzzled into his new dads neck for the very first time, I picked up my phone to take a picture of the cute scene and the time said:

12:12

I knew in that moment days before we picked him up
That he was the one
That he was going to change our lives forever

Cacao moved into our bedroom with Dom and I moved into a guest room, being a light sleeper I knew that the puppy would keep me awake. And I wanted Dom to bond with him, for them to have time together alone.

That first night as I meditated in bed in the Churchill Suite it fully landed
Just how ridiculous worry is
How wasted our energy is when we could be experiencing something else
I suddenly saw how much time I had spent on worrying about something that didn’t happen
When I could have been looking forward to this magical homecoming

My greatest fear
Never materialised

Dom has wanted a dog for the 10 years I’ve known him
But I always put the brakes on it because of the cats (they are now 7)
My worry for the cats
The anxiety I was predicting
AND NOT WANTING TO GO THERE

But something so deep has shifted for me this year
I no longer want to worry
And Cacao held the space for me to transcend my limiting beliefs
So I could break through and drop the story of worry

So I did on that first night
And I would never be the same again
Worry no longer has a place in my life
And so much more has opened up
There is SPACE
There is FREEDOM
There is so much more time to LOVE and be LOVED

Then the question appeared in my next meditation
WHO AM I UNDERNEATH THE WORRY
And
WHO COULD I BE IF I WASN’T WASTING MY TIME BEING WORRIED

And I’d been here before with my previous addictions
I’d been amazed at how much headspace was freed up and available once the drink demon had departed
But
I’d never been here before with worry
This had always been by my side
Pulling me back
Coaxing me into fear

But now I was ready
To shake off the burden of lack
And fully step into abundance

As the week has gone on I have felt lighter and lighter
More and more my true self
Now I can watch as the worry trigger enters my head
Sometimes I begin to act upon it
Then catch myself
And let it go
JUST AS I DID ALL THOSE YEARS AGO
With cocaine, cigarettes, sugar, junk food, caffeine, codeine and booze
It’s exactly the same process that the QS approach takes
FOR ALL SUBSTANCE ADDICTIONS
And
FOR ALL EMOTIONAL ADDICTIONS

The journey keeps on unfolding
We never ‘get’ anywhere
And I can’t wait to see where Cacao Quantum takes us!