Daily Motivation 276
Watching someone truly see themselves for the first time is an honour and a privilege. I often watch the pieces coming together as a member ‘gets it’ and I know that this person has literally just changed their lives forever. For QS runs so much deeper than merely substance abuse; it is a school of life and the tools and techniques shared within can be used in all areas of your world. Some think that they are not ‘bad’ enough to join or not far enough down the line to need an ‘addiction programme’, but the truth is that we are ALL addicted to some degree and understanding this approach takes your whole life to the next level; relationships, work, health; your attitude to everything, everyone, including yourself.
The next person I’d like you to meet understands this, and was supporting the group at large long before she officially became a QS Guide. It is with great pleasure that I can introduce to you the fourth of the QS Guides: Jayne
Jayne
❝I had been a weekend binge drinker for many years and someone who loved to party, it was part of my lifestyle and I presumed I would grow out of it, but that didn’t happen.
I had been working in the Fitness Industry for years and I coped ok with the drinking as I was so fit and I didn’t feel guilty about it, but as time went on I did wonder how old I would be when I finally calmed down.
As I moved more into the Mind, body and coaching field, my drinking did start to bother me more. I began to feel a bit like a fraud and guilty that people were paying me to help them with their stress and deeper challenges.
I used to have a voice that constantly said things like “Do you think you would be better at this if you hadn’t drank so much at the weekend”… “Are you good enough to do this, when you drink so much?”…. “Do you think you are giving them your best?” .. “Who are you to help someone else, when you can’t even moderate your own drinking?… You get used to living with this as it’s subtle but it does take an effect on your self belief and self esteem over time, and at some point something is going to tip and it did.
I reached my enough point after a drunken tantrum at home after a good night out. This was not usual for me, I was usually a happy, fun loving drunk person, a bit loud and silly and at the worst a drunken argument very occasionally with a loved one, but this time was different. I had been dealing with some life stress and I had stopped enjoying drinking. I noticed I felt numb or worse every time I drank, it wasn’t fun anymore.
This particular night for the first time I lost control. My tantrum came out of nowhere and I did not feel it coming and nothing happened to set it off. This was my enough point.
I had scared myself and realised that I had to get really clear headed to deal with the underlying stress of what was going on. I knew though that if I went a week or two without drinking I would think I had done well and it was ok to drink again, only it wasn’t ok anymore as how did I know that I would not get upset and shout my stress out again; with no control.
I also knew that all it would take was a special event for me to tell myself it was ok to drink , but even this felt wrong now.
I knew this would happen as I had done it time and time again; telling myself I would have a break, cut down, stop, but it never lasted.
I couldn’t trust myself, so I made a decision and called Jo.
I already knew Jo from social media and I had been down to the retreat centre before, so I was well aware of what she was about and her approach made a lot of sense to me, so I joined the programme and that was it.
The relief when I joined was so big, it was shocking. I really understood in that moment how much my drinking had been bothering me.
I got into the programme straight away and it really resonated with me. To be honest it was an easy fit as I already meditated and had trained as a teacher in meditation, only I used to use it to balance out the drinking.
I understood all of Jo’s teaching and where she was coming from and I knew what she spoke of was the truth.
The other people in the group are fantastic and the support is just invaluable and makes such a difference. Some of the people I have met in the group will probably be friends for life, because we have shared a profound and intimate journey into change and change is what this programme gives you.
It’s not about the drinking or the drugs.. It’s about healing whatever lies beneath that, so you can be free.
I would without a doubt recommend QS to anyone who is struggling with addiction and wants to really get free of it, for it is very possible through this programme.
Eleven months in, I am the person I was meant to be. The peace of not having that voice anymore is life changing itself. You just don’t realise how much it drags you down, till you don’t have it. That is a massive freedom in itself and to grow from there takes you further than you ever thought possible, which is what this programme supports. I don’t need the accountability anymore for sobriety, and because QS has been so successful for me and I have fully enjoyed the programme and the process, I am now a QS Guide. I believe that as more people find out about QS it will get much bigger….❞
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