Day 57
Are You Going To Ask That Imposter To Leave?
With Jo in retreat for 10 days we thought we’d send you some of her old blogs to tide you over until her return…
“It’s exciting when you go into retreat Jo. You always come out with something new to share and benefit your tribe and inspire others”
Jayne, Online Programme, UK
Blog From April 2016:
Our natural state is one of peace, love and connection. However we are pulled away by intoxicants, stress, boredom and conditioning. So if within us we have the potential to realise all of our dreams, why then do we continue to harm ourselves?
We know that taking that drink, pulling cancer-forming smoke into our lungs, shouting at our spouse or eating the whole packet of biscuits is damaging not just our bodies but our mental health. But we continue the behaviour, perpetuate the cycle, and strengthen the habit every time we indulge in it.
So today take a look at where and when the addictive urge takes hold of you. Believe that you deserve to let go of who you have pretended to the world (and yourself) to be so that the REAL you can step forwards and claim the life you deserve.
Are you going to ask that imposter to leave?
And whether it’s drugs, alcohol, food or low self-esteem NOW really is the time to come back to your natural state of peace, love and connection.
Can you imagine how different your day could be without the imposter of drink/drugs/food/etc?
Gift yourself the day that you deserve…
Day 58
What Filters Are You Looking Through?
With Jo in retreat for 10 days we thought we’d send you some of her old blogs to tide you over until her return….
“It’s exciting when you go into retreat Jo. You always come out with something new to share and benefit your tribe and inspire others”
Jayne, Online Programme, UK
Blog From April 2016:
We all see through filters.
What our parents taught us, our community imparted, school educated, our peers shared and how our job trained us.
Our beliefs developed through all of this, depending on who we listened to, what was available to us, and where in the world we grew up.
For anyone that has had an eye test you will know that the optometrist fits different lenses into a special pair of glasses to find the perfect ‘sight’.
When we are addicted to something that is destroying us we are seeing through a distorted lens; this is not our natural state (see yesterdays blog). And we know that things are not as they should be, we are struggling, searching, and having an almighty battle with ourselves.
So once we have established that we want to change, it is time to remove the outdated lenses (old conditioning) and begin to fit some new ones. This is the key to freedom; changing your mindset and belief system, and the fast track to do this is via meditation. When we access our subconscious mind and plant seeds of freedom down there, they will grow into all corners of our lives and we access genuine and authentic happiness; the sort that comes from the inside out.
So what filter are YOU looking through?
What has society taught you thus far?
Do you think that sobriety needs to be a lifetime struggle?
Or do you want to join the ever growing community who are discovering the joys of freedom?
I have experienced both, and can assure you that freedom tastes sweet and succulent and life offers me new and exciting opportunities each day because i am fully present and open.
I am totally available with the negative filters gone and my mind resting in a coherent state.
Quantum Sobriety’s intention is to join like-minded souls together to support each other in a new vision, a joint filter of freedom.
Welcome!
Day 59
The Addictive Urge
With Jo in retreat for 10 days we thought we’d send you some of her old blogs to tide you over until her return….
“It’s exciting when you go into retreat Jo. You always come out with something new to share and benefit your tribe and inspire others”
Jayne, Online Programme, UK
Blog From April 2016:
When someone is having a crisis over on the Quantum Sobriety online course forum there is always a ton of support. We’re all in this together and understand implicitly what the other is going through; we’ve all experienced the pull and charge of the addictive urge, and know how powerful it can be at times.
That’s why having an open forum works.
What I have noticed is that when an individual has one of these meltdowns it becomes a pivotal moment; they can do one of two things:
1) drink/drug/eat what they’re urging to do, continue on the never-ending loop of craving and reward, and experience what they always have.
2) step off the merry-go-round, do something different by NOT drinking/drugging/binge-eating, and experience something new.
Of course when we’re stuck in the cycle of addiction number 1) plays out over and over again to the point that we feel like we are going mad; why do this to ourselves?
But number 2) requires strength, determination and a period of discomfort; of which some people are never willing to embrace.
I believe that addicts are strong, think about it, to put a bottle or two of wine into your system every night is no mean feat! Constitutionally your physical and mental self copes day after day of this continual punishment (that we crazily see as reward: how f**ked up is that).
So QS is about harnessing that strength that you are currently using to get high and channel it into finding freedom. In that moment that you are engulfed with an addictive urge, rather than go where you’ve always gone before; STEP UP to a higher reality.
THIS IS YOUR CHANCE
In this moment you have the opportunity to go somewhere new, somewhere exciting, somewhere that is more beautiful than anything you could ever imagine.
Don’t be scared, walk through and claim what is rightfully yours:
Freedom.
THIS IS YOUR CHANCE
Don’t squander it, dull it, stamp on it, or ignore it.
This is the moment that you’ve been waiting for:
THIS IS THE GATEWAY TO FREEDOM
Everyone sees this place as a negative, but I am asking you to turn it 180 degrees into a positive. Just like most people see addicts as weak and I see (the ones that want to be free) them as strong.
It’s all in the mindset.
Freedom is the blink of an eye away
….if YOU believe it.
I’ve done it
Others in my programme have done it
And there is NO reason why YOU can’t do it too.
Have a very wonderful day, and get in contact if this resonates…
Day 60
Which Lane Are You Currently In?
With Jo in retreat for 10 days we thought we’d send you some of her old blogs to tide you over until her return….
“It’s exciting when you go into retreat Jo. You always come out with something new to share and benefit your tribe and inspire others”
Jayne, Online Programme, UK
Blog From April 2016:
This works with all addictions: alcohol, stress, drugs, anger, sugar, or over-eating….
In ANY situation there are many potentials, all potentials in fact. Take sugar addiction as an example; there are the following possibilities:
1) eating tons of sugar and not having a problem with it
2) knowing that you eat too much sugar and looking for alternatives
3) actively cutting down on sugar
4) only having sugar on ‘special’ occasions
5) not eating any sugar but craving it like mad
6) not eating any sugar and enjoying the fact that you are so much healthier
Each of those 6 potentials is available to you RIGHT NOW
Which one are you choosing?
These 6 alternate realities are running side by side right now like lanes on the motorway; which lane are you currently in?
Each one represents a different mindset
Each mindset when you’re in it 100% IS NOT DIFFICULT
It’s only difficult when we have one foot in our old life/reality and one foot in the new.
We are neither one place or the other!
We know that we don’t want to carry on where we were, but are not yet fully embracing where we are going.
You couldn’t go from 1) to 6) in an instant, just like you couldn’t go from the inside lane to the outside lane without passing all the lane in between; there is a path that needs taking to lead you there. Taking some of the steps will be easy and others more challenging, but once you have progressed to the next level fully it becomes effortless to STAY there, and that is a mindset shift.
Think about being on a busy 6 lane motorway. You start in lane 1) and pulling out into lane 2) is easy because there is nothing to stop you pulling out. Getting into 3) is more of a challenge as there is a car right in your way. Moving over to 4) and 5) is fine but getting into lane 6) is a real challenge because the cars are moving so fast. Using this example shows us that changing our mindset is just like being on a motorway; all lanes are available to us, did you get that?!
ALL LANES ARE AVAILABLE TO US, and we choose where we want to be, with each one being EASY to be in once you are there 😉
Here is a comment from inside the QS online course forum from yesterday,
“It’s not like trying to tame an unwieldy beast anymore, just learning how to live the way I want to. Such a mindset shift, and it’s been so struggle free, I’m almost feeling it’s too easy and waiting to fail like I always do… But this feels so good it’s completely different!”
Tomorrow’s blog: HOW to jump to a parallel universe…..
Day 61
Which reality are you going to choose?
With Jo in retreat for 10 days we thought we’d send you some of her old blogs to tide you over until her return….
“It’s exciting when you go into retreat Jo. You always come out with something new to share and benefit your tribe and inspire others”
Jayne, Online Programme, UK
Blog From April 2016:
Once we realise that where we want to go, once we’re there, is effortless and the struggle is ONLY when we are in between realities, then it becomes easier to step into the unknown.
Today we’ll take alcohol as an example. There are six different realities that we can choose from:
1) Drinking too much and not aware of it
2) Drinking too much and becoming aware of it
3) Actively looking for a solution
4) Finding a programme that resonates with you
5) Stop drinking but struggle and still want to drink
6) Stop drinking and ENJOY sobriety
So the reality of the above list is that we all know people who fit into one of the six options, we all know people who drink too much and either are aware of the fact or are not; we all know people who would like to stop drinking; we all know plenty of people who are STRUGGLING in their sobriety; and you know at least me who has moved from too much drinking to FREEDOM and HAPPINESS in sobriety.
Each of these six stages is possible.
There are millions of people all over the world living in one of these six realities right now.
Acknowledge that fact right now.
Stop reading this blog NOW
Close your eyes right now and repeat the following sentence seven times,
“freedom in sobriety is possible for me”
….if you choose it, it can be yours right NOW
Believe it
Believe in yourself
Each of these six stages is possible for YOU
And everyone right in this minute fits into one of them 100%
BUT NO ONE FITS INTO MORE THAN ONE OF THEM -FULLY- AT ANY TIME
It is impossible to be at 1) and 3) at the same time
It is impossible to be at 1) and 4) at the same time
It is impossible to be at 3) and 6) at the same time
It is impossible to be at 5) and 6) at the same time
All this means that YOU have to CHOOSE which reality you COMMIT to being in and be there fully. I’ll give you some examples:
– Meditating
– Exercising
– Eating well
* When you are meditating give it 100% of your effort and learn to not be distracted: create a comfortable area; turn your phone off; tell the family not to disturb you, and practice will connect you to who you really are and the huge power reserves within.
* When you are exercising give it 100% of your effort. An athlete is not thinking about how they wish they’d stayed in bed that morning as they train; they are FULLY committed to what they’re doing.
* When you are making a smoothie give it 100% of your effort; don’t think ‘maybe i’m going to change my mind and stop making this healthy smoothie and go eat McDonalds’
YOU GET OUT WHAT YOU PUT IN
And the tiniest mindset shift, hopefully just by reading these words, can take you into a different reality
In the blink of an eye
As quickly as that
The six options are parallel universes, all running alongside each other like lanes on the motorway. You decide which lane you’re going to be in. And you move there just like that. That’s how easy it can be. If you decide that you deserve easy! And that’s where we are going in tomorrows blog…..
Have a great sober day.
Day 62
Your Prescription.
With Jo in retreat for 10 days we thought we’d send you some of her old blogs to tide you over until her return….
“It’s exciting when you go into retreat Jo. You always come out with something new to share and benefit your tribe and inspire others”
Jayne, Online Programme, UK
Blog From April 2016:
So what if I told you that I could give you a prescription for medicine that would change your life for the better?
I can give you this medicine which works like magic.
BUT
I can’t take it for you.
You have to actually consume the medicine for it to work; not leave it on the shelf looking at it. You wouldn’t do that with conventional medicine after all would you.
Ok
So I am giving you the QS medicine: MEDITATION
The prescription says take the medicine everyday by sitting on a cushion for 30 minutes, closing your eyes, and listening to the guided visualisation.
No excuses why you can’t
No excuses why you haven’t got time
No excuses why you haven’t got space
No excuses why your mind is too active (everyones is in the beginning)
No excuses please!
The medicine works.
You just have to take it.
For when we turn inward and unite with our true self during meditation we connect to our wisdom; all the answers to all of our questions are in here but are usually buried underneath the layers upon layers of social conditioning, hangovers, doubt, fear, remorse and guilt.
The medicine dissolves these layers, just like a pill from the doctor would take away the pain, one by one we uncover who we really are. The answers spring up effortlessly, just this morning in a class someone said afterwards,
“I need to journal what’s just come up, I can’t believe the thoughts that i’ve just had in the last 30 minutes!”
The longer you take the medicine the better you get (obviously).
Every single dose changes you (obviously).
WHY ARE YOU NOT TAKING YOUR MEDICINE?
Day 63
No More Hiding
….and we’re wondering what insights she’s had whilst in retreat these past 10 days. Her first real-time blog will be tomorrow morning….
“It’s exciting when you go into retreat Jo. You always come out with something new to share and benefit your tribe and inspire others”
Jayne, Online Programme, UK
Blog From April 2016:
I had a deep shift yesterday which began in my meditation and was then reinforced as I trained, and then again throughout the day as I received confirmation that this new way of thinking is indeed how we are supposed to view ourselves.
For my whole life I have been covering up, scared to show my true self, and hiding behind anything I could to stop myself from being ME.
And it began nearly 30 years ago when I started smoking cigarettes.
My parents have never smoked so I didn’t pick this behaviour up from them, but I can see how I used the smoke as a barrier, quite literally a smokescreen.
SMOKESCREEN:
noun
a cloud of smoke created to conceal military operations.
“troops laid down a smokescreen to cover the rescue of the victims”
a ruse designed to disguise someone’s real intentions or activities.
“he tried to create a smokescreen by quibbling about the statistics”
Oxford Dictionaries
I hid myself behind a continued cloud of smoke, feeling safe and protected from life here, and only now some three decades later realising what I was doing.
A few years after creating this first mask for myself I moved to ecstasy and cocaine; taking myself to higher levels; moving further away from my soul and constructing a new persona. I was more confident, felt alive, awake and expanded. But these highs came with painful lows; days and weeks of suffering and thus yearning to reach that fake summit again.
Ten years ago I stopped drugging, but I didn’t stop hiding.
The behaviour mutated to drinking.
I was now using alcohol to numb out from myself and life; literally drinking until I blacked out and became UNCONSCIOUS.
I also began to overeat at this time too.
I watched my body become softer and fuller, like I was constructing a protective padded suit to insulate me from life.
I knew I was in there, safe, sheltering from the harshness of life.
Where it’s scary to be yourself.
Where it’s intimidating to show who you really are.
The pressure to conform to what society deems as ‘normal’ being titanic.
And what if you get rejected being yourself?
Is that why we create the smokescreens?
If we show the facade and get denied then we can build another one; a denser one:
More food
More alcohol
Prescription/over the counter drugs
Caffeine
Cocaine
…..all safeguarding us from our truth.
This is what we learn from society.
HIDE
Cover yourself
Eat
Protect your soul
Don’t get rejected
You can’t handle it
Drink
Numb out
HIDE
Run away
Meditation is the exact opposite, which is perhaps why some find it SO difficult in the beginning.
We have to peel away all of these layers that have been there a lifetime; it’s not going to happen overnight.
It takes dedication
Strength of character
Discipline
But what I touched in on yesterday was my core
My truth
My soul
And I had an image and feeling of this wadding that i’ve placed around myself, and how it spans the whole of my life. It’s now nearly gone and yesterday I experienced myself totally.
No protective layer
No falsehoods
Absolute purity
It was BEAUTIFUL
And I know that others see it in me, like I see it in you.
SO WHY CAN’T WE SEE IT IN OURSELVES?
These feelings and words have been formulating inside me over the past 24 hours, but as I express them in word form here I have tears falling down my face as they are released, and I become unobstructed from my true nature…..
Meditation can take YOU there.
Deep into your subconscious mind.
Where all the answers lie.
And I can show you the steps that I took to become MYSELF.
It is my souls work to do so.
And it makes me happier than anything else.
Let me be a bridge between your worlds.
We can do this together.
YOU are not alone.